Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Slip 'n Slide


Happy Tuesday everyone. I was reluctant to share this story with you, but I have had so many requests for it lately, I didn't want to leave anyone out. Plus, retelling the story is part of my "therapy." It's amazing to me how the things that happen to a person early in life can shape who they become.

I was 9 years old and the very first kid on my block to get a Slip 'n Slide. For those of you who do not know what that is, it's a long piece of yellow plastic that you hook up to a hose. The hose creates a water stream that sprays on the entire length of the plastic, making it slippery. The idea (without breaking your neck), is to take a running leap, land on your stomach, and slide down the plastic, rendering yourself helpless to the fun and excitement of it all.

This day was going to be all about me. I had invited my friends, 13 in all, including Donna (a fictitious name to protect her real identity). Now, since I was the first one who had one on the block, I was going to be the first one to take the fun-filled journey down the slide. After all, it was only fair. It was MY yard and MY Slip 'n Slide.

I strategically placed my friends down the entire length of the slide to ensure everyone had a chance to see me having fun. Don't get me wrong - they were all going to get a chance, I just wanted the jealousy to soak in for a little bit. I figured they would appreciate their turn even more. To this day I am still trying to figure out exactly what went wrong.

I had a good running start, a good take off, and a great initial contact with the slide. But somehow, the string on my bathing suit and my flabby gut created friction with the slide itself. As I took my dream ride down the slide, my bathing suit took a nightmare ride down my legs in the opposite direction. Now mind you, my bathing suit didnt just simply fall off, but intricately rolled into a tight, wet, ball that ended up bound to my ankles by the time I reached the end. It all happened so fast.

I know you are laughing, and so was everyone else, including Donna. Recovering from this was almost impossible. There was no way to quickly pull my bathing suit up before anyone could see. My shorts were wound so tightly around my ankles that I could barely get them off (which was the only answer). I had to stand up, take them off, unroll them, and then try to put them back on. I have never heard 13 kids laugh so hard in my life. I sent everyone home. Thirty-seven years later, I can hardly look Donna in the face. I know she still thinks about it. haha

To this day, I am never the first person to get something. To this day, I always try something out first before "exposing" it to anyone. I hope the story starts out your week with a smile or a laugh, and even though I am not completely over it, I am that much closer to letting it go. :)

Have a great week.



Anonymous said...

Great column. Very funny!

Sarah Heuer said...

Ha Ha! Thanks for sharing this funny story!


PLEASE NOTE: When commenting on this blog, you are affirming that any and all statements, and parts thereof, that you post on “The Daily Grind” (the blog) are your own.

The statements expressed on this blog to include the bloggers postings do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the Academy of General Dentistry (AGD), nor do they imply endorsement by the AGD.