Friday, May 8, 2009

More stories

Hi all,
I don't have much time so I will get right to it.

In dental school we had a class full of partiers and for two years your truly was the "social chairman" (this was actually voted on).
We worked very hard and partied very hard.
One party I remember (must not have been a very good party) was after Neuroscience class.
This was a grueling class. It was everyday for 12 weeks. There was a lab, where we dissected the brain and were able to touch and feel the parts (yummy). So in about the middle of the class we started to plan the after party. This is how we coped.
Well in the Neuroscience lab there were plastic models of parts of the brain. Hypothalamus, cerebellums on stands that we could look at and see.
Well someone from the class before us stole a lot of these. It was at this students' house (another big partier) we were going to have this party.
The teachers assistants were always PhD students and they were only about 2-4 years older than the class they were teaching. So we invited them to this party.
Well if you can put two and two together we had this awesome party and everyone was having lots of fun, along with the teachers and out come the stolen plastic models.
The teachers were having such a good time they didn't give one hoot about the contraband at the party.

Last year my dad asked me how much I drank in college. I let the question just hang there for a minute and said, "You just don't want to know."

In the early 90's all lectures were given from slides. The digital revolution just missed us.
So before a teacher would start their lecture they would always have to lug all these carousels of slides to the back of the room.
Well, remember I spoke of the partiers in the class before us. Well, one of the guys had this idea that he would change one of the slides with his own premade slide.
Now one of the worst classes we had was Systemic Pathology. OMGosh it was so long and boring. I mean the stuff was okay to learn but you are learning all these diseases and syndromes that doctors never see. So it is an hour of torture three days a week. Slide after slide of cells and and mutations of cells. BORING.
Remember I was telling you about the premade slides...yeah well this guy went and made a couple of slides of Playboy centerfolds.
So he starts in on our class and how we really need to do this prank.
Now, I have this friend and classmate, lets call him Dave. Great guy, great dentist, great heart.
We partied together and had lots of fun together. There was a bunch of us that, during the didactic part of school, hung out at the bottom third together.
We all knew who we were because when they posted the grades they did it by Social security numbers. Well everyone knew everyone else's SS numbers. The smart people knew every ones to make sure they knew where the competition was. The ones at the bottom knew each others because misery loves company. (as an aside, the guys at the bottom during this part of school mostly kicked butt during the clinical part of school. For instance I finished all my requirements for clinics 6 months before school was done. And I don't remember getting a B or lower in the second two years of school).
Anyway, the guy from the class before eggs Dave on to putting the centerfold slides in the carousel during a System Pathology class.
We were talking about some disease and then BAM up comes a woman in all her glory.
The class went into hysterics. We were belly laughing. Well most of us were.
Oh I forgot to tell you the teacher was a female. She was a very nice woman and fun. But it was at this moment she turned. She was so angry.
She demanded at that moment who did this. And as we were all laughing poor Dave was inches from being expelled.
So we all calmed down and realized that Dr. Jones was pissed beyond belief. Then it was three more cell pictures and diseased people slides and then it was another Playboy centerfold.
And if you thought she was pissed before...ooh baby.
So the next day our class had a meeting with an attorney briefing us on Sexual Harassment.
Then we got a public lashing from the Dean.
There were a couple of people in our class that complained that they were mortified and very offended (You don't want to know how I feel about this. I have already gotten in trouble on this blog.)
Dave was brought in to have a "sit down" with people that were going to decide his future.
He would be on probation for the rest of his dental school career, with a One Strike policy.
Oh those crazy dental students.

One last story.
I finished school and took my state board exam. These are not the days of computers when you find out your score in a week or two. SIX WEEKS we had to wait to see if we passed.
I was a nervous wreck for this whole time. I didn't realize someone could have diarrhea for that long.
I didn't sleep. I had night sweats and lots of nightmares.
But to pass the time I would come to my father's office and pull weeds (it was therapeutic).
So I remember it being a disgustingly hot day. I was in the front of the office doing yard work. I was soaking wet and terribly dirty. It was days until the results where suppose to be out.
I remember this because I was in the front of the office saying hello to people as they were coming in (dirt and all).
It was funny to see people's expressions when the gardener was greeting them. They didn't know who I was.
Come to find out that three days later I found out that I passed (just barely...story of my life). I came into the office (cleaner this time) to just help out. I wasn't going to officially start for a week or two.
My father was running behind and the assistant needed my father to take an impression on this one patient. So the assistant grabbed me and said you are going to have to do this.
I remember being physically pushed into the room. I started to dialogue with this patient and I could tell both her and I realized at the same time she one of the woman I said greeted when I was weeding just a few days back.
Then I saw this look on her face like, "What is going on here? Why is the gardener working on my teeth?"
Man those were the days.

Have a great weekend,
Talk to you Monday,
john

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