Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Run Forest Run

Hi y'all,

Remember on Monday I had to cut the blog short because of a doctor's appointment. Well we went.
For the new to the blog people, I will give you a quick up date.
My wife is pregnant and everything was going pretty good.
About 4 weeks ago (at about 11 weeks into the pregnancy) we were hit with the news that something was wrong.
The baby had something called a Cystic Hygroma. This was an accumulation of fluid on the back of its neck. This was not all that great. The prognosis was such...25% chance everything was going to be fine, 50% chance there was going to be some sort of chromosome problem with the baby, and 25% chance the baby wouldn't make it.

Now since I have told you the original news, we have gone again and things were about he same.
Heartbeat was good and the baby was growing but the Hygroma was still there.
But also we have received some news from some experts that we know.
Our OB stated that, in his 30 year career, he has never seen a Hygroma before. This means that by the time he takes his first ultrasound (about the beginning of the second tri-mester) they have gone away. This was encouraging.
Next bit of news was that the word from another specialist was that if it was a chromosomal problem, that 95% of the baby's had Turner's syndrome. This is a syndrome that the female individual is sterile. They are usually a little shorter in stature and can't have babies, but other wise normal.
Also very encouraging.
So as Christian people we didn't really know what exactly to pray for.
I told you that my wife was praying for complete healing of the baby. That our baby would fit in the 25% of the kids that are born totally fine.
I was praying that God would things would be okay but if not then I was just praying the strength to be obedient.

So back to doctors appointment on Monday.
It is still kind of a stressful deal. I mean you are going in for an ultrasound and it is going to tell you how things are progressing.
I kept asking Hilda, "How are you doing?" She was always fine.
So they brought us back and the ultrasound woman began the sonogram.
There is a tense minute or so as she looks around and you know she is looking for things and clicking the buttons but not saying anything. It is eerily quiet.
I guess too quiet because Hilda asked, "Are we suppose to hear a heartbeat?"
The woman said, "Yes". There was no heartbeat.

Our baby was no longer living.

As I was watching the woman do her thing, clicking all the buttons and typing, I forgot the most important thing, the heartbeat.
Of all the things we were praying for, of all the things we were thinking. We forgot of the 25% chance it wouldn't make it.
This blindsided me. The woman said, "I am sorry guys, the doctor will be in a minute".
So it was Hilda and I in this dark room, it was tough.

But this is not the worst of it.
We had a miscarriage last July. This was not so traumatic. We found out we were pregnant and I week or two later they couldn't find the heartbeat.
Hilda had a D and C and that was it (men if you don't know what a D and C is ask your wife and if you are single look it up on the Internet, or ask your mom).
In and out of the hospital and she was in no pain, just a little sadness, and we went on with our life.
This one, because the baby died after 13 weeks, is too big for a D and C.
She has to deliver the baby.
We are going to the hospital tonight so Hilda can be induced.
Yes, like a real delivery. THIS SUCKS.
Then they went on to say that they can take footprints for you and if you want you can spend time with the baby before you leave the hospital.
Did I say, "This sucks" yet?
I wont get into all the gory details but the nurse at the hospital says she has seen this take 8 hours and she also has seen it take 3 days.
WHAT?!!
If all the stuff doesn't come out (maybe I am not sparing you the details) with the delivery, then they have to do a D and C.

So there it is.
So do me a favor, if you pray, pray for Hilda. As you can imagine it is tougher for the woman, very emotional, maybe a little guilt. Pray that everything goes well today and tomorrow and that she will heal inside and out.

Thanks,
john

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

We are thinking of you today. I am so sorry.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry - we'll say a prayer for your family.

Buckeyedental said...

Dear John
Our prayers are always with you.

Kim L Shaw

Anonymous said...

There are no words to make things better. We are very sorry and pray for your family during this difficult time.
Ed and Mary Brosman

E.W. Looney said...

Wow. At times like these, aren't you glad to know God has provisioned a perfect will for your life? It may sound odd to mention now, but without knowing He is in control the pain would be all there is.

My wife and I have been praying for you since the beginning. God Bless.

Anonymous said...

John,

Ethan, Mike, & I all prayed for you guys last night at dinner. I am heartbroken for you. May God cover you with his comfort and peace.

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